TNT 116 – The Art of Dying (1991)

THE ART OF DYING is such a special little oddity. What can be said about the man, the legend, Wings Hauser. He was Hasselhoff before there was Hasselhoff, right down to the weird curly short mullet. But Hauser brings a decidedly more intense brand of toxic masculinity to his roles, and this film is perhaps the peak of his robustness in this regard… or maybe it was Arklon from Beastmaster 2…?

THE ART OF DYING centers around the skeezy underbelly of Hollywood, where lurid creepazoids, most posing as photographers or filmmakers, are always targeting the incessant stream of fresh-faced hopefuls from middle America. Wings plays “Jack”, a detective on the hunt to solve the mystery of the missing starry-eyed vixens.

Simply put, this movie is totally ridiculous. The music, the imagery, the dialogue… just everything. There is a sex scene with a half gallon jug of milk that’s been sitting in a window sill. Are you convinced yet? Just trust us on this one.

9:15PM, drinks in the saloon, and as always FREEEEE!